Communication with your partner is THE most important thing in any relationship, whether you swing or not. It is important to make sure that your partner knows that they are the most important thing to you, and that swinging will always come second. If at any time they feel otherwise, your relationship is in trouble. Before you start swinging, you should make sure that your relationship is secure, with a strong backbone of communication. You should talk to each other about what makes you happy, what turns you on, what bothers you and what you could not handle seeing or doing. And you have to listen to each other.

Use the issues you discuss to help you set boundaries and rules when you do enter the lifestyle. Never do anything that either one of you are not comfortable with. Setting boundaries will help insure that feelings are not hurt. Make sure that anyone you swing with is aware of your boundaries and rules prior to swinging. By ensuring that the other people involved are aware of your boundaries, you will ensure that your boundaries don’t become a problem later (they will have already been addressed and if the other people you are with can’t handle your boundaries then they should say so). It’s best to discuss this before you get to your party location.

Don’t be afraid to set your boundaries to tight, you can always expand them later, as you both grow more comfortable with what you are doing. However, if you set the boundaries to loose or don’t set any at all, it is very likely that one of you will get their feelings hurt, because something happened that the other wasn’t comfortable with.

Communication must occur at all times. This includes, not only when the two of you are alone, but even when you are with other couples, no matter how may times you have been with them.

Before you and your partner go out to meet another couple, establish ways to communicate between yourselves that others won’t be aware of. That way if you meet someone and one of you is not interested, they can communicate that without flat out saying it. The same goes with if you are both interested and want to proceed.

Don’t be afraid to speak up during an encounter if something is bothering you, or if you aren’t comfortable for any reason. Keeping feelings to yourself will only cause resentment. It is better to get things out in the open and cleared away than to have them fester so that something that could have been taken care of easily becomes a large issue.

There isn’t enough I can say to stress how important communication is. If it is there, it can create the strongest relationship possible, if it is absent, it will most likely destroy a relationship.